Trojan Horse

Below is a quick 60 second play made by faithfully yours. It combines a couple issues and concepts. Some examples include: the absurdity of smoking being legal, cell phones and infertility, alien invasion, trojan horse, lead piping in roman bathhouse, intelligence design, and conspiracy. If you couldn't figure how this story might fit together, don't worry about it, you are more than likely normal. I don't even know how I made all those ideas fit in one piece. If you want to find out what the actual story is about. Seek and you shall find.
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"You are a genius!"
    Exclaims Alien Invader 1.
"Yes I am,"
    Says Alien Invader 2 as he glows happily.
"Remember the good old days when we introduced lead piping into Roman bathhouses?"
    Alien Invader 1 says dreamily.
"How can I forget? I thought you went crazy when you taught those barbarians personal hygene."
    Alien Invader 2 replies.
"Ha, yeah, too bad they didn' realize it was a trojan horse. They never learn do they?"
    Says Alien Invader 1
"They were getting entirely too civilized, it was a necessity on our part to stall their technological advancement until our army arrives."
    Alien Invader 2 speaks patrioticly.

"Yeah, bathhouse only exists in major cities where the Roman elites congregate. By introducing lead piping, we eliminates their best people's fertility. Then add a little nudging of neighboring barbarians - We have a nice recipe for the Dark Age."
    Says Alien Invader 1 as he recalls the past triumph.

"But now, now I have done it again!"
    Exclaims Alien Invader 2 happily.

"You sure have! As if the voluntary introudction of tobacco by this planet is not enough, we have given them cell-phones!"
    Alien Invader 1 has awe in his voice.

"Ha! And you were so worried when i try to show Mr. Bell how to transmit sound through transmission lines. We have to think deep and plan far, my little green friend. After all, there is another couple thousand years of waiting."
    Alien Invader 2 says preachingly.

"I couldn't agree more. The radio wave frequency from cell phone is doing nice work on current human sperm DNA structure. Further more, only the more elite population carry it, so we are effectively weeding out the best of their kinds again. I couldn't believe they are stupid enough to carry one around without shielding. The best part is, they even carry the cell phone at their hips, near their genetic storing organ!"
    Alien Invader 1 says with glee.

"I can see the next Dark Age coming soon, I can use another vacation for the next couple hundred years."
    Alien Invader 2 says with quivering anticipation.

"Where do you want to go this time? Last time we went to the Vega System and came back too late. Humans were already in industrial stage."
    Alien Invader 1 says worriedly.

"We won't go far this time, just to the Gemini System, a couple dozen light years away. We will be back in time before they rebuild the civilization this time."
    Alien Invader 2 says reassuringly.

"Nice! I hear they have nice hydro-gaseous based intoxicator"
    Alien Invader 1 concurs.

"Let me just speed up the process a bit first, this plan of introducing "Intelligence Design" into their science class room will sure set back their civilization by centuries."
    Alien Invader 2 says with authority.

"Oooooh, nice, maybe we can have some more witch hunts and teach them about Earth being the center of the universe."
    Alien Invader 1 says enthusiasticly.

"Let's get to work! The sooner we are done the sooner we can take a vacation!"
    Alien 2 rubs his hands excitedly. Then they get to work.


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